Grief never ends … but it changes. It’s a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith … It is the price of love.” ~ Unknown Author ~
Grief has an incredible and insensible way of holding onto your emotions and making you have a sense of alienation from reality – the power and unpredictability can leave you somewhat numb. People who have never felt grief from losing a loved one feel that they should compare it to their life, like they know exactly what kind of pain you’re feeling. They’re just trying to help, try and not get to aggravated and angry with them, they just don’t understand.
Here is a little advice. If you know someone that has lost a loved one (spouse, sibling, parent, etc.) please do not give them your rendition of how you know how they feel because you went through a divorce or didn’t get that job you went and interviewed for. See, death trumps everyday life occurrences… while there may be pain involved; it’s not the same as losing a loved one. Be gentle with them and just be there as a shoulder to cry on or just an ear to listen to what they have to say. There is no daily life stressor that can compare to what that person is feeling right at that moment from losing their loved one. It takes time, and just so you know there is no specific time frame that person has to go through to “get over” their grief. – Be patient with them and just pray that their heart and soul mends quickly.
Grief becomes apart of you… never ending, always changing and at some point it does get a little easier to deal with the pain. Grief is not a place to stay and does not have to define you as a person, it is going to suck, hurt and make you feel a hundred emotions at one time… But, remember this, it does get better and at some point (at your own pace) you will be able to breathe again and that will be the moment you start taking those baby steps of putting one foot in front of another. Never compare your grief to someone else’s grief – it is all different, we might understand the pain the other person is feeling, but never compare. Always be that uplifting soul that gives them hope that one day they will breathe again and they will see the sunlight and a new day as a new beginning.
Grief is a complicated thing …it holds so much pain, emotion and change that everyone really does experience it differently. Do not be ashamed of your grief, don’t hold it in like it is some weakness… the only way to heal is to go through the emotions, embrace it and not let it change you into a bitter person. Unfortunately death is apart of life and while we can never explain the pain it makes deep inside our hearts we must always live life the way we promised our guardian angels.
Now, go and Carpe the Hell Out of Diem and make your guardian angels proud of you (likeI am), you beautiful souls.
XO,
B
(Me and the JazzApple … the 4 legged soul who helps me stay centered)
Cowgirl Grit 